Vampires Suck… acting!

Gotta love parodies! Well, don’t have high expectations of this film if you go to see it! You have to realize that Vampires Suck is a spoof movie and is not meant to be the blockbuster, emotionally attaching, awe-inspiring movie of the summer. So, after watching it, I knew that writing this review would indeed be a mighty task as it cannot be reviewed as most other movies. I had a choice to either review it as a bad movie or a good spoof. I wasn’t sure which direction to go with this one.

If you recall the review for The Twilight Saga: Eclipse (click here to revisit that review), I informed you all that I was not a Twilight fan. And if you’ve been reading this blog for any period of time you will know how much I just “love” Kristen Stewart’s acting! hahahaha! Well, Vampires Suck laughs with me at all of the little things that annoyed me about the Twilight movies. 

Vampires Suck goes through the plot of the  Twilight movies so far in one big spoof. In a style that very much resembles movies such as Scary Movie, Superhero Movie, Date Movie, etc, the blatant imitation of Twilight is very much in your face. The actors that were picked emulate the Twilight characters very well. The girl who imitates Kristen Stewart, for example, was perfect in her role. She copied all of Stewart’s awkward mannerisms, stares, around-the-ear hair twirling, stuttering, and more. All of the actors made me laugh in how badly their acting performance was in order to call out the quality of acting in the Twilight movies (stand, talk, stare with open mouth, pose, talk, stare….okay, next scene). Quite like those in the Twilight films.

This film goes all out in pointing out all of the things in Twilight that bug most people. The movie very quickly bores as you wait for the next laugh. As a matter of fact, most of the laughs were contained in the trailer. It does get old and played out, because it is another retelling of the Twilight movies, and is over the top in everyway. The randomness, imitation, bad acting, cheesy gimics, and play on the original make this movie fun for all those wanting to see a movie that bashes on all the “Twi-hards” and “Boy Wolf Packs” out there and their idols. Even if you are a Twilight fan, you will see some merit in this film.

Don’t expect the best movie of the century in this one for sure. It is not the best film, but it is a well done spoof. I will say, it was funny to see them call out Jacob for having his shirt off every ten minutes or so in the movie! Ah, gotta love spoofs! And, if you do, you will like this one. I actually think Twilight fans will enjoy this movie more than anyone else.

Thanks for reading! 

Enjoy if you wish…or don’t enjoy! Happy watching!

Ultimately, I have to rate it as a bad movie instead of a great spoof….sorry! So, here goes:

The Sp1der’s Score1.5 out of 10 stars Vampires Suck


  1. Looking forward to renting it. Don’t wish to spend copious amounts of money or energy going to the movies to watch it. Like all the other movies of their genre, they are meant to be tongue in cheek kind of humor that camps it way into your heart. Thanks for all you do Scarlet Spider… and keep up the great reviews!


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