The Faster It Ends, The Better!

“Good” wrestlers can be good actors, right? I mean, Hulk Hogan, Andre the Giant, Stone Cold Steve Austin, Kevin Nash, John Cena, Goldberg, Randy Savage, Jesse Ventura, even Triple H all had their cameos on the big screen! Add Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson to that list too! Johnson has been in several titles and played several roles….most of them were the same role, but who’s taking notes?! After discussing The Rock’s movies with my friend, Lady Damon, we decided that one really can’t tell the differences between some of his characters in movies like The Rundown and Walking Tall or, for that matter, almost all of his movies. Well, add Faster to that accomplished list of films. But, Faster should be the adverb describing how you ran FROM the theater instead of TO it for this film.

In case you missed it, here is the trailer for the film, Faster.

As other trailers will tell, Faster is a film about a recently released ex-con on a fast track to revenge and retribution after he was doublecrossed and his brother was killed.  (At least that is what the trailer would HAVE you to believe.) The director seems bent on not telling as much of Johnson’s story as he should, but on telling as much story as he can about other characters, relevant and irrelevant alike.

Johnson shares the screen with Billy Bob Thornton (Slingblade), Mike Epps (Next Friday), and Carla Gugino (Watchmen)…but the one that steals the majority of the movie is Oliver Jackson-Cohen. Not because of his British accent, or gorgeous girlfriend, or fast luxurious sports cars….but he steals the movie simply because he is who the filmers decided to focus on for the majority of it…..and his story is irrelevant in the big picture of the plot. This, my friends, is one of the biggest problems with this movie. It wastes too much time on other side stories, and pays little attention to strengthening the main story of the film. It only pays tribute to the events leading up to the film via a few quick flashbacks here and there.

Another issue with this film was the predictability of it. From the moment you are introduced to Billy Bob Thornton’s character, you automatically may know what to expect from him and where the story may lead. Clues throughout the movie only help to solidify hypotheses surrounding the plot. Again, too much in this film focuses on the other characters and you sit there hoping those scenes would end faster in order to get to the few action-packed, adrenaline-pumping scenes that reel your attention back in faster than Scorpion’s spear in Mortal Kombat. While some may debate if The Rock has used steroids or not, one thing is for sure….you don’t want to stand in his way when he is mad!!! And this movie proves that! Oh boy! He is quite menacing and it works for this film…..very well.

Johnson actually does a decent job acting his part as the cold, callous avenger seeking justice! Part rogue vigilante, part road-raged mercenary, Johnson’s character is the type that you reluctantly, yet excitedly, cheer on as he hunts to execute those who wronged him one by one. He, seemingly, is the only character who shows any type of development/growth and it is a lot of fun to watch on the screen. Had the directors focused more on his story and strengthened it, it would have had the makings to be a greater movie. But the whole “focus elsewhere” aspect of the film proved to be a detriment to any credence it may have earned.

Overall, gunshot and hand to hand fight scenes make the movie fun for the action seeker, but this film fails to bring the stories together in a fashion that lends itself to greatness; and ends up rather predictable to those familiar with this “seen before” plot. It is in this film that Johnson is actually the best actor of them all…..and that says a lot. I was prepared to say that the only thing that should end faster than this movie is Johnson’s acting career…..but, in this case, it was his role that kept the movie going. Sorry, but, when it comes to this movie, the only thing I wanted to come faster was El Fin.

Thanks for reading!

Enjoy if you wish…or don’t enjoy! Happy watching!

The Sp1der’s Score: Overall: 5 out of 10 stars “Faster”

btw, can I make note of one thing? Look at the bottom of the movie poster. It says “This year the holidays come faster.” That is the most ridiculous part of this poster, as the movie has absolutely NOTHING to do with the holiday season. Just thought someone should point that out. 🙂

up next: “Movie News Monday!”


  1. While I can’t say I was waiting with bated breath for the movie to end, it is definitely one that will soon be forgotten. It was nice to see Johnson back in the action genre too. Nice review! And yeah, that poster line is ridiculous! HA!


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