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My Hollywood Fantasy Draft Pitch (#3)

March 14, 2012

It’s that time once again. Castor, over at Anomalous Material, is hosting another round of the Hollywood Fantasy League.

You can see exactly how it plays out here, but the general way it works is by drafting actors and directors onto a team and gaining points for your team based on their individual movie’s performances throughout the year. You can also earn more points by creating a film of your own, with said cast, and pitching it to a movie studio as it were. (This is my 3rd time at doing this, here you can see entry#1 and entry#2.)

Below is my team along with my pitch for your consideration. I hope you enjoy. Thanks for reading! Go Team Focused Filmographer 2012! 🙂

Righteous Retribution: The Daughters of Job (pronounced “Jōbe”)

Introduction

The Book of Job in the Bible tells the account of a righteous man by the name of Job whose faith in God was tested when trials came his way. Satan challenged God that Job would curse Him once the multiple blessings bestowed upon him were taken and then replaced with hardships. Satan took literally everything that was precious to Job away (his possessions, his 10 children, his friendships, his health, his support from his wife, etc).

While enduring much hardship and heartache, “In all this did not Job sin with his lips” (Job 2:10). And, as a result, at the end of his testing, God blessed Job with twice the amount of all that he had lost prior to his testing…twice the lost gold, twice the lost cattle, twice the lost possessions, and even 10 more children.

“…also the LORD gave Job twice as much as he had before…He had also seven sons and three daughters. And he called the name of the first, Jemima; and the name of the second, Kezia; and the name of the third, Keren-happuch. And in all the land were no women found so fair as the daughters of Job: and their father gave them inheritance among their brethren.” (Job 42:10,13-15)

BUT!

What if there was an untold continuation of this account? What if, years later, Job’s three daughters decided to exact revenge upon those that caused such grief and pain? Imagine, if you will, that after years of hearing of the tragedy in testing that Job prevailed through, his daughters (warrior princesses as it were), rampaged their father’s assailants to avenge their family’s prior losses?

This tale is that untold story.

The Cast

  • Liam Neeson: Job
  • Alice Eve: Jaelle (daughter #1, originally named Jemima)
  • Kate Beckinsale: Kezia (daughter #2)
  • Elizabeth Banks: Amara (daughter #3, originally named Keren-happuch)
  • Robert Downey, Jr: Eleazar (Family friend of Job)
  • Tommy Lee Jones: King Garuth of the Chaldeans
  • Steven Brand: Jerubaal (The Sword of Chaldea)

The Characters

Job– aged and exhausted, yet revered and honored throughout the land. Wise and loving. Has lived a life full of abasement and blessing both. Man full of conviction, faith, and love.

Jaelle– eldest daughter of Job. Grew up with 7 brothers. Responsible and mostly level-headed. A follower more than a leader with an eye for Eleazer.

Kezia– middle daughter of Job. The fire-cracker. Always working to stand out of the shadow of her sisters and over-accomplishing brothers. Her picture is next to the word “Competitive” in the dictionary. Not easily discouraged, fights with strong conviction. Aware of Amara’s idolization of her and takes advantage of it, but loves her the most also. Loves her sister Jaelle too, but never obeys her.

Amara– the youngest of Job’s children. Idolizes Kezia. The fairest of the three. Doted upon by Job as she was the final child. Seeks to impress Kezia in all she does.

Trained by their father and living/fighting with seven brothers, Kezia, Jaelle, and Amara are well versed in weaponry and tactics. Jaelle (the archer), Kezia (the sword specialist), and Amara (the staff expert).

Eleazar– friend of the family for years. Grew up as “the kid next door.” Knows of Jaelle’s affection towards him and has used that to his advantage for many years. Secretly likes her too, but he loves his wine more.

King Garuth– leader of the Chaldeans. Responsible for most of the trials that came to Job through his time of testing. Rich and powerful with a lust for beauty, gold, and power. An evil man.

Jerubaal (played by someone like Steven Brand who played Memnon in The Scorpion King) -Considered “the Sword of Chaldea” nephew of the aging and heirless King Garuth. Skilled in several arts of war, he is no enemy to be taken lightly. Ambitious and hotheaded, he also eyes the Chaldean throne.

The Tale

After a quick telling of the prior events of Job’s life and trial, we begin right where the book of Job ends: The death of Job. We find Job, surrounded by his family. His final days on this earth have come. His wife having passed on 10 years prior, his daughters and sons (and THEIR daughters and sons) now gather together to say their final goodbyes to their last remaining parent. As the sun sets in the oasis of the desert land that Job calls “home”, Job passes from this life to the next. His burial is an event for the historical records. On his tomb read the words he so eloquently stated during his famous testing:

“Naked came I out of my mother’s womb, and naked shall I return thither: the LORD gave, and the LORD hath taken away; blessed be the name of the LORD.” Job 1:21

Kezia (gorgeous, yet unmarried) the middle daughter of the wealthy patriarch, speaks to her older brothers (visiting from lands far away to which they migrated to) and sisters and shares her long kept desire to avenge  her father after growing up hearing all the stories. Her brothers, aged and with lives and families of their own told her to let the past be buried with their father and live her life as he would have wished.

Kezia does not like her brothers’ somewhat selfish answers and convinces her two other sisters and their family friend, Eleazar, to join her in chasing down and defeating her father’s enemy, King Garuth of the Chaldeans.

Kezia, Jaelle, Amara, and Eleazar amass a group of veteran warriors and family friends sympathetic to their cause. North to Chaldea. As word spreads of their pursuit in high numbers, King Garuth sends a small contigent of warriors, as opposed to his entire army as suggested by his nephew, the commander of his forces, Jerubaal, to negotiate terms (either peacefully or aggressively). Led by Jerubaal, the Chaldean warriors march south toward the vengeance-seeking siblings.

Jerubaal finds the sisters long before they reach Chaldea. Commands them to turn around and leave this quest alone. Refusing and driven by Kezia to fight, the sisters refuse and prepare their outnumbered troops for battle. Although outnumbered, attacking the sisters forces proves to be harder than expected for Jerubaal’s forces. Jerubaal retreats to report back to Garuth, but not before taking Eleazar captive.

The daughters and their forces…battered, regroup and commit to purpose with resolve. A small victory drives them with thought of blessing from their father now in paradise. They can’t help but be saddened with thoughts of their captured friend, Eleazar.

Not all goes so well for Eleazar. Or so it would seem at first. Soon after capture, his immediate tortuous beatings and punishments are replaced by royal treatment of wine, food, and tons of other delicacies as King Garuth woos him to undermine the sisters’ uprising to allow for the capture of the daughters and, subsequently, the whole of Job’s estate and riches (which rivaled that of the Chaldean king’s possessions). A plan is hatched, a deal is made, and Eleazar, under promise of gold, wine, and position, “somehow” manages to “escape” and find his way back to the sisters in the middle of the night.

Jaelle, overwhelmed with joy at Eleazar’s return, tells Kezia that she no longer wishes to fight, but rather wishes to return home and end bloodshed. Kezia…almost feeling guilty begins to listen until Eleazar (of all people) tells them that to be this close and turn and run would bring dishonor upon the name of Job. While unsure about Eleazar’s newfound resolve, Kezia tends to agree and Jaelle and Amara follow as usual. They march toward the Chaldean encampment in the night. The campfires on the horizon serving as their target.

In the encampment, now joined by King Garuth, Jerubaal waits for the dawn. The dawn of the day…and the dawn of HIS reign. Garuth takes too many liberties and has overlooked his counsel for the last time.

The sun arises, as does the revived fire within Kezia and her sisters to avenge all that transpired which caused their father Job so much grief. Garuth would pay…and he would pay with blood at the hands of these three Warriors of Wrath.

[Insert massive battle scene- hundreds wounded on both sides; fires raging; arrows seeking and finding their targets; blood-stained faces, weapons, and armor;]

Jerubaal awaits the pre-arranged signal from Eleazar to begin to flank. Eleazar heads to set his plan in motion, Jaelle follows him, unaware of his upcoming betrayal. Reaching a gate to let Jerubaal in, Eleazar opens the gate and then realizes Jaelle saw him at the exact moment that an arrow from Jerubaal’s bow pierces her chest. Eleazar falls to her side as she gasps for air in complete disbelief. Jerubaal approaches them both, looks down upon Eleazar and says “Garuth thanks you. Here is your promised reward.” Jerubaal’s sword pins Eleazar to the ground next to his dying love. Troops pass by unhindered and uncaring.

Kezia and Amara, having seen this take place rise up to meet Jerubaal and push him back. Battle continues as the forces of Kezia and Amara push toward King Garuth.

Jerubaal and his forces retreat back to Garuth’s encampment. Now facing an ever more enraged Kezia and Amara, their forces begin to crumble.

Preparing for the worst, the Sword of Chaldea sees an opportunity to claim the throne when a turned eye provides opportunity in the middle of chaos in the camp. He slays Garuth right as Kezia and Amara encroach upon their tent. Standing there, with the King lying lifeless on the ground, Kezia yells with opportunity of vengeance lost and her sword finds way to release Jerubaal’s head from his body.

The tent curtain falls and the screen fades to black.

2 months later. Kezia stands as Warrior Queen of all of Nythracia (the combined lands of Job and Chaldea). Her brothers and Amara stand as rulers over double the wealth, land, and riches of her father prior. She carries with her the memory of her father Job and her sister Jaelle. Both avenged, Retribution had been made…but at a high cost.

The End

*as a reminder, this did NOT happen, this is simply a work in progress about a “What If…” that hit my mind while in church one day! A fun thought! I welcome your critiques, ideas, and thoughts, keeping in mind that for sake of length, I could not include every detail that I wished to.

Thanks for reading!

T, The Focused Filmographer

up next: Trailer Time Thursday.

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17 Comments leave one →
  1. March 14, 2012 6:24 pm

    The pitch didn’t completely grab me, but i can’t say exactly what. I think perhaps it was hard to tell who the main character was?

    Like

    • March 14, 2012 6:48 pm

      Thanks for reading. That’s good feedback. I wanted to bring out Kezia more just couldn’t. Thanks

      Like

    • March 14, 2012 6:49 pm

      It’s really abt all 3 daughters

      Like

  2. March 15, 2012 9:43 am

    I haven’t had time to read this yet but I will this afternoon! Looking forward to it T 😀

    Like

    • March 15, 2012 5:39 pm

      Whenever you have time Castor. I look forward to it. I know how busy you are. Don’t know how you do it man.

      Like

  3. March 15, 2012 11:57 am

    Oh my! An adaptation of the compelling Biblical story of Job by Christopher Nolan??!! Well you know my answer T, of course I would see it in a heartbeat! You know I love Biblical epics and Hollywood don’t seem to be interested in them the way they did with Ben-Hur, or if they did they want to make it a non-spiritual story [like Aronofsky’s trying to do with Noah], heh, why bother then?

    Anyway, making this a historical fiction sounds great, T. Well done with the pitch, great cast too with Aslan as Job 😀

    Like

    • March 15, 2012 5:46 pm

      Ruth! thanks. I glad that you like it.

      It just hit me in church several months back (about 8 months actually) and the idea kept evolving to this. I’d like to continue working on it and write a fuller screenplay for it!

      Appreciate your kind words!

      Like

  4. paulaguthat permalink
    March 15, 2012 12:10 pm

    I would be interested to see this, T. You’ve got one of my favorite directors and some really good actors, plus an unusual story that really hasen’t been done. I agree with dirtywithclass’ suggestion, that it would benefit from more focus. But if you think of epic movies, they don’t all always have focus on a single character.

    Like

    • March 15, 2012 5:47 pm

      Thanks Paula! So glad to get your feedback here. Thanks for reading it as well. I’d love to see this film made myself.

      Like

      • paulaguthat permalink
        March 20, 2012 12:53 pm

        You’re welcome T, my pleasure. Sorry that i haven’t been around much :\

        Like

      • March 20, 2012 3:29 pm

        no worries. Hey, I tried to visit your page with the link in my blogroll and it wasn’t there. Would you mind clicking it and making sure I have the right spot?

        Like

      • paulaguthat permalink
        March 21, 2012 7:23 am

        Thanks for letting me know T! i just tried that link and it worked. I got hacked over the weekend. Google blacklisted me & DNS lookup probably failed at some point. It’s fixed now I believe.

        Like

      • March 21, 2012 10:05 am

        whew! okay. Glad you are no longer at the mercy of hackers. Sorry to hear.

        Like

  5. March 17, 2012 9:45 am

    Didn’t realize you have posted your pitch T.
    Because it is a long read,I will read it in my mobile phone and get back to you again…soon 🙂

    Like

    • March 18, 2012 5:07 pm

      It’s all good Nov. Whenever you have the time.

      Like

      • March 20, 2012 4:48 am

        I have finally read it, T 🙂

        great job. I can see the epicness of your movie. I thought Job’s family wants to take revenge at God…that would be not interesting, good thing their revenge is toward another human being.

        Like

      • March 20, 2012 8:16 am

        Thank u so much. Glad u could see the epicness! Appreciate ur feedback my friend.

        Like

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