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Review: The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn, pt 2

November 18, 2012

The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn pt 2

  • Starring:  Kristen Stewart (Panic Room), Robert Pattinson (Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire), Taylor Lautner (The Adventures of Sharkboy and Lavagirl 3-D) and more.
  • Directed by: Bill Condon (Dreamgirls)
  • Synopsis: “In the highly anticipated next chapter of the blockbuster ‘The Twilight Saga’, the newfound married bliss of Bella Swan (Kristen Stewart) and vampire Edward Cullen (Robert Pattinson) is cut short when a series of betrayals and misfortunes threatens to destroy their world. After their wedding, Bella and Edward travel to Rio de Janeiro for their honeymoon, where they finally give in to their passions. Bella soon discovers she is pregnant, and during a nearly fatal childbirth, Edward finally fulfills her wish to become immortal. But the arrival of their remarkable daughter, Renesmee, sets in motion a perilous chain of events that pits the Cullens and their allies against the Volturi, the fearsome council of vampire leaders, setting the stage for an all-out battle.”
  • Rated: Rated PG-13 for sensuality, violence and some disturbing images.
  • Trailer:
  • Review:

Finally, the end is here! (at least we hope) 😉

It’s no secret that I am no fan of Twilight, Kristen Stewart, sparkling vampires or much else of anything of the “Twilight” persuasion. I mean, if you want to watch something about vampires and werewolves, there is so much better material out there. But, this is not a movie about vampires and werewolves as much as it is a love story that just so happens to take place among them. That being said, I did my best to venture into the theater to watch this movie as objectively as I could.

And I succeeded in my objectivity…for almost a full minute. 😀 I am at least happy to report that this movie met up to my expectations. However, those expectations were quite low. The following includes my thoughts on the conclusion of The Twilight Saga and why you should or should not go see it. Enjoy! 😉

5 reasons NOT to watch Breaking Dawn pt 2!

  • Horrible CGI (Computer Generated Images)…and I mean, horrible. It is a shame that such a BILLION dollar franchise lacks in the ability to produce a non-freakish looking baby that is all CGI. Could they not a find a human baby to use? Seriously!

You thought I was being bias didn’t you? 😉 Nope, this CGI is just “turrrible.”

  • More of Kristen Stewart’s staple wide-eyed, open-mouthed empty stare…and laughable acting. Granted, I have heard from fans of the book that Stewart is pretty much what they’d expect from the character of Bella. But, if that’s the case, add ANOTHER reason as to why I won’t be reading the books anytime soon. (Tied in with the inclusion of several other ridiculous, or, to be fair…forgettable additional characters.)

This slideshow requires JavaScript.

Granted, the entire cast tried to give Kristen Stewart acting tips. Not sure it helped though. 🙂 WATCH- I tend to agree with Jacob in this clip. hahaha

  • Most of the acting, as a matter of fact, is no more spectacular than the acting seen in the first Twilight movies. It’s a shame too. The likes of Michael Sheen, Dakota Fanning, Billy Burke and more are as cold in emotion as a vampire is. (Perhaps that’s the point.)

Vampire Fashion Show: The Napoleon Bonaparte Cult Clothing Line

  • Author Stephanie Meyers, of course, has freedom to write whatever she wishes. But while the changes made in vampirism is original, yes, they are also odd and, at times, just weird. For example, some of the vampires now have X-Men like mutant powers. That’s cool and all, but it is a little overdone in this film/series. (Other weird things aside from sparkles, sprinkles, and superpowers such as Imprinting, which makes it okay for Team Jacob to be infatuated/in love (?) with Bella’s daughter)

awwwkkwwwaaarrrrdd

  • Ludicrous moments. I guess it could be said that Twilight is a laughable comedy/rom-com at best as the love story is present and the bonds of love (familial, friendly, parental, etc) that make their mark are partnered with the likes of:
    • (a) the boy who cried wolf, Taylor Lautner, who must be allergic to shirts that fit, or any shirts at all for that matter,
    • (b) Super-powered Kristen Stewart tackling a mountain lion and punching rocks,

      Kate Beckinsale she isn’t

    • (c) watching the actors pretend to interact with a fake baby, and
    • (d)  the rest of the vampires who sit around in the house doing nothing but stare at each other and talk in a rather monotone/undead manner.

FEAR NOT, though. I aim to be fair!… Here are 5 reasons that may help you justify watching The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn pt 2

  • Alice is Hot!

  • A cool fight scene that breaks the monotony and comatose state of the story and attention of the viewers and rewards them for sitting through so many droll movies that go practically nowhere.

Throughout half of the movie, the Cullens work to assemble a team of vampire/mutant warriors to stand on their side against the Vampire executive/executionary branch (essentially). The culmination of their efforts leads to a battle in the snow with surprises, shocking deaths, and, oddly enough, satisfaction to an extent. I actually did enjoy the whole epic battle scene that die-hard twihard fans are all in an uproar about because apparently it doesn’t happen in the book. If you are a twihard and you undoubtedly go to see this movie, the epic battle scene is easily explained. Settle down. Once you see the film, you will understand and appreciate it “staying true” to the book if you will. I will say, though, that this little “deviation” is one of the only things this film has going for it (aside from it being the conclusion…and an open-ended one at that).

They run towards each other much like another set of mutants (cooler ones) from Saturday morning!

  • Alice is Hot!!

  • It’s tree-friendly. “Treehuggers Anonymous” will enjoy the movie as there is an unending amount of panning shots that show off tons of trees in the forests.

  • Oh, and Alice is Hot!!!

😀

Suffice it to say, there’s not much to celebrate during the film, but there sure is quite a bit to rejoice over at the end: namely, the credits as they signify the end!

You’ll have to wrestle me to get me to sit through another Twilight viewing.

At least we can say goodbye to the “Teams”, the interesting, but disappointing take on vampires and werewolves, messages of not being satisfied with oneself (Bella’s incessant pouting sessions of being a “normal teenager”) and horrible in-motion stills of expressionless vampires!

So, if someone offers to take you to Twilight, take a lesson from Team Edward and Abraham Lincoln: RUN! 😀 

*Disclaimer: This review may have been a little juvenile, but then again, so is the movie. Hope you enjoyed. It truly was more fun to write than to watch!

Score:  1.5 out of 5 stars for The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn, pt 2 (just .5 higher than Part 1)

———-

Similar Titles that I have Seen and Recommend INSTEAD (click title for details/review):

Thanks for reading! Happy Watching!

T, The Focused Filmographer

up next: “Movie News Monday”

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32 Comments leave one →
  1. November 18, 2012 7:16 pm

    Y’know, perhaps the bad CGI will eventually become the George Lucas-like excuse for re-releasing ‘Special Editions’ with new ‘effects’ and make even more money down-the-line. Now there’s a thought ;-).

    Like

    • November 18, 2012 7:19 pm

      Perhaps. but it still won’t lure me to seeing it again haha. but you’re right. hmm, purposeful bad production to rerelease for more moolah.

      intriguing.

      I was hoping that Disney would do that first though…rerelease the original Star Wars trilogy on Blu-ray without the CGI “Lucas Upgrades.” If they were to lead the pack in that tactic I would be okay with that. 🙂

      Like

  2. November 18, 2012 8:23 pm

    :)) I can’t help but laugh seeing that Will Smith image. Yeah, that must’ve been awkward for K-Stew to connect to something unreal. I just reviewed this too, and I thought it’s a wasteful thing to spend plenty of money for that CGI baby and little girl. what’s wrong with a regular baby?
    I know what you mean about the vampires doing nothing, don’t they have jobs or at least the doctor have clients?
    But I think I love it more than you do, at least K-Stew didn’t look weak or powerless than before.

    Like

    • November 19, 2012 1:09 pm

      hahah. 🙂 Thanks for reading and enjoying the review. I will be checking your thoughts out soon (I am on my way into work right now) and see just how much we agree. I guess there is a shortage of real life babies to use. ha

      I am sure you loved the movie more than I did, though. and that’s okay. K-Stew wasn’t weak and powerless, true, but that’s kind of a bad message to share with kids that as a normal person you amount up to nothing but weakness. eh, perhaps I’m reading too much into it.

      whatever happened to Disney movies reoccuring msg of “Be Yourself, you are wonderful”? haha 😀

      Like

  3. Anonymous permalink
    November 18, 2012 8:42 pm

    HAAAA HAAA HAAAW! Haven’t seen it yet. All of my Twihard friends LOVED it. I WILL see it and WILL enjoy it. In trying to feel your pain, I imagined myself having to sit through, and then critique a Star Wars type move. (HATE anything to do with Star Wars, Star Trek, or anything like it.) Thanx “T”

    Like

    • November 19, 2012 1:10 pm

      🙂 haha oh man, this was so much fun to write. not a Star Wars/Star Trek fan huh? Thanks for then seeing/feeling my pain.

      Like

  4. November 19, 2012 1:43 am

    a whole 1.5 stars!! LOL

    A brave man watching this drivel!! Thanks T

    Like

    • November 19, 2012 1:14 pm

      I did it for you! Scott. The People (as Bane says at 2:10-2:14) hahah 🙂

      Like

  5. November 19, 2012 4:55 am

    I agree with Scott…very brave indeed. I may check out Vamps starring Alicia Silverstone with the same mindset…will it be “this film is so bad it is bad” or “so bad, it is actually worth seeing just to poke fun at it”!

    Like

    • November 19, 2012 1:17 pm

      Thank you Dan. I gladly wear the badge of courage to help ward my readers away. 😀 hahaha.

      hmm, you have fun with Vamps now.

      Like

  6. Trevor permalink
    November 19, 2012 6:53 am

    There’s not a power in the ‘Verse that will make me stop screaming “THATS SHARKBOY!” every time I see Taylor Lautner in anything.

    Frickin’ Sharkboy….

    Like

    • November 19, 2012 1:16 pm

      Yep, you are wise my friend! 😀

      Like

  7. November 19, 2012 9:10 am

    I LOVE that last photo! Whilst I was watching Lincoln Vampire Hunter I kept wishing he had swung that ax on the Cullens and the rest of the werewolves clan!

    Why oh why is Lee Pace in this?? I only hope that it’ll only bring him more roles, man he deserved better!

    Like

    • November 19, 2012 1:16 pm

      haha, i thought that pic was perfect, esp since the 2 movies released together. LOL. Did you see the movie yet? Or Lincoln?

      Like

      • November 19, 2012 1:18 pm

        Nope, I opted for indie movies this weekend which proves to be a good decision 🙂

        Like

      • November 19, 2012 1:21 pm

        ooh, I will be visiting in the next cpl days and reading what you saw! but…go see Lincoln.

        Like

  8. November 19, 2012 10:45 am

    Aahahhahahahhahahhahaaaa!!!! I was waiting for this review. I know u couldn’t wait to post ur Twilight venom in this review. It seems like you got so much joy out of writing this one. It is no secret that u are not a fan of this Saga, so I expected u to say nothing great about it. I agree with u about the freakish CGI. I thought it was laughable, but for some reason, it didn’t bother me as much as u. This Saga is just cheesy, and I have learned to take it for what thats worth. I enjoyed this final chapter far more than you. I thought the acting caliber of the characters got better with each movie. Kristen was a babe in this film, and far less doe eyed. Her character had way more substance. As far as endings go, I left the theatre totally satisfied with the conclusion of this story. I think ur rating is far too harsh my friend…lol

    Like

    • November 19, 2012 1:16 pm

      hahahahaha. Hi Tajuana. I was wondering when you be by to read this. I had SO much fun writing this review.

      when it comes to the CGI, did the filmmakers think we were living in the era of the movie Children of Men? There still are real babies out there. LOL

      I am glad you enjoyed it for what it’s worth. Thanks for enduring my entertaining review. I myself still laugh reading through it. 😀

      Like

  9. November 19, 2012 11:02 am

    Ha! knew they couldn’t make a single good film in this awful film series! Knew it!

    Like

    • November 19, 2012 1:14 pm

      haha. u have great instincts

      Like

      • November 19, 2012 1:30 pm

        How can they make 5 big budget pieces of crap in a row?!

        Like

      • November 19, 2012 1:47 pm

        ask the makers of Saw, Paranormal Activity, Ice Age, Spy Kids, Step Up, and Resident Evil…people keep throwing their money at ’em.

        Like

      • November 19, 2012 2:10 pm

        I don’t consider all of their films to be terrible

        Like

      • November 19, 2012 2:17 pm

        LOL fair enough.

        Like

  10. November 20, 2012 11:50 am

    Oh my gosh. I just loved your review. It makes mine seem nice by comparison. Well not really, check it out if you enjoy a good rant.

    You hit all the important parts. That CGI baby was just ridiculous. Such an expressive face for a newborn baby!

    Like

    • November 20, 2012 12:44 pm

      ha! 🙂 Thanks Mark. It really was a lot of fun to write. Glad it was enjoyable.

      I will be stopping by to read. I am very behind on everyone’s pages (apologies)!

      That CGI baby was so bad…

      Like

  11. November 21, 2012 8:26 am

    LOL!! So Frackin’ Awesome! (Your review…not the movie…)

    Alice is HOT! The only solid reason to sit through this embarrassment to vampires and werewolves…too funny.

    Glad you got some pleasure out of your sacrifice. ;D I can not do it. I think I watched the first 3 (out of the I should know what this is all about mentality) but then I could not watch anymore.

    Thanks for the laugh–Happy Thanksgiving!

    PS Vampire do NOT Sparkle! They usually burn, disintegrate or explode in sunlight…just sayin’…

    Like

    • November 27, 2012 7:00 pm

      Thanks for reading and enjoying the review I wrote here. haha. You and I agree completely on Alice. 🙂

      I just can’t get into the whole sparkling vampire thing at all. It’s much more fun watching them explode in the sunlight and burn! ha

      Like

  12. November 28, 2012 8:22 pm

    Personally, I think the most absurd moment in the entire movie was the “passion” scene. Complete glitter and sparked. My friend and I are HUGE fans, even planning Twilight parties. We had tears rolling down our faces we were laughing so hard at that scene! I still laugh every time I think about it!! The rest of the movie, I thoroughly enjoyed! I really did enjoy the fight scene and was quite upset! 😀 Thanks T!

    Lori

    Like

    • December 5, 2012 12:11 pm

      Well, I absolutely agree that scene was absurd! ha.

      Thanks for commenting. I’m glad that you enjoyed the review and the movie.

      Twilight parties, huh? 😉

      Like

Trackbacks

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