Mini-Reviews: “Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters” & “Movie 43”

Greetings all,

Today, here are two quick mini-reviews for the afternoon. One is of the twist on the classic tale of Hansel & Gretel entitled Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters and the other one is of the star-studded comedy entitled Movie 43.

Enjoy.

Hansel & Gretel: Witch HuntersHansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters

Directed by: Tommy Wirkola

Starring: Jeremy Renner (Mission Impossible: Ghost Protocol), Gemma Arterton (Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time), Famke Janssen (X-Men: The Last Stand) and more.

Rating: R -for violence, nudity, language and stylistic gore

Trailer:

Synopsis: After getting a taste for blood as children, Hansel (Jeremy Renner) and Gretel (Gemma Arterton) have become the ultimate vigilantes, hell-bent on retribution. Now, unbeknownst to them, Hansel and Gretel have become the hunted, and must face an evil far greater than witches… their past.

Review: I wonder what the Grimm brothers would have to say about this continuation to his classic tale of so long ago that features their two young heroes as weapon-wielding, vengeance-dealing, justice-seeking siblings who hunt down witches as a team 15 years after their infamous escape from the witch house made of candy. Grimms, I wish you could see Hansel and Gretel now!hansel and gretel

In a style that blends a little bit of Van Helsing and Sherlock Holmes with Blade and Red Riding Hood, Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters is a fun mix full of action, adventure, violence, blood, humor, romance, witches, trolls…well, it’s just plain fun! With subtle references to other fairytales along with a few characters such as a pining sidekick who resembles and acts like a live version of “Hiccup” from How to Train Your Dragon, this spin surprisingly was more enjoyable to watch than I thought it would be.hg

Most times, child stories mixed with R ratings tend to be misses rather than hits. The R-rating in this situation actually contributes to the films enjoyment as you may either cheer in celebration or grimace in disgust as blood, brains and broomsticks riders splatter across the screen (See it in 3D! It’s even better!) hahaha. 😀 The film walks the line between seriousness and cheesiness quite well. It keeps you laughing at things intentionally and unintentionally meant to be funny, all the while keeping you interested in how it will end.

While no awards will be given for makeup, original screenplay, costume design, performances or even soundtrack (as it all ends up blended together in a rather forgettable way), it is fun watching good ol’ Hawkeye from The Avengers and the princess from Prince of Persia get beat up a lot…because they sure do take on the beatings! With plenty of predictable plots and laughable events this Not-Family-Friendly Fairytale accomplishes what it set out to do: be a fun R-rated story that easily entertains in the field of “What Ifs” in our mind. Face it, you always wanted more of the Hansel & Gretel story other than just “and they lived happily ever after.” Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters gives you the “ever after” and is far better than the psuedo-spin fairytale movie Red Riding Hood. Give it a shot.hansel-gretel-witch-hunters06

Oh, and don’t stop by any houses made of candy. There. There’s your PSA of the day! 🙂

Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters.

SCORE: (3/5 stars)

———————————————————-

Movie 43movie43

Directed by: Elizabeth Banks, Steven Brill, Steve Carr, Rusty Cundieff, James Duffy, Griffin Dunne, Peter Farrelly, Patrik Forsberg, James Gunn, Bob Odenkirk, Brett Ratner, Jonathan van Tulleken. (I’m not kidding, there’s that many directors…check out all the actors)

Starring: Dennis Quaid, Hugh Jackman, Naomi Watts, Seth MacFarlane, Kate Winslet, Liev Schreiber, Will Sasso, Common, Halle Berry, Chris Pratt, Emma Stone, Kate Bosworth, Richard Gere, Terrence Howard, Anna Faris, Justin Long, Jason Sudeikis, Uma Thurman, Kristen Bell, Chloë Grace Moretz, Gerard Butler, Seann William Scott, Johnny Knoxville, Josh Duhamel, Elizabeth Banks, Tony Shalhoub and more!

Rating: R -for vulgar situational comedy, graphic nudity, rude and crude language.

Trailer:

Synopsis: From the twisted minds of producers Peter Farrelly (Hall Pass, Shallow Hal) and Charles Wessler (There’s Something About Mary, Dumb & Dumber), comes Movie 43— the outrageous new ensemble comedy starring some of the biggest names in Hollywood. Movie 43 is not for the easily-offended and contains jaw-dropping, sometimes shockingly disturbing, but always entertaining intertwined storylines you’ll have to see to believe.

Review: Did you read that entire cast list? Everyone on that list has gone down a step or two on my “respect” list after seeing this movie.

Warning: The taglines are true.

Just when you thought it couldn’t get more offensive.

Once you’ve seen it, you can’t unsee it.

Against my better judgment, I went to attempt to watch this movie. I knew what I was getting into after seeing the trailers (Both greenband and redband versions) for Movie 43, but the idea of so many A-list stars in a movie that looked to be about absolutely nothing and already looked bad still had my interest.

I went and stayed much longer than I should have (for the record, this movie now holds the title of “The 1st Movie I Ever Walked Out On”). I stayed for a while, hoping that it would get better…it couldn’t get any worse, right? I mean, after all of the raunchy antics, the gross depravity, the satirical jabs it takes…it had to ease up and get better. Right?

Wrong.Movies-Movie-43-Hugh-Jackman-628

After sitting through about 20-30 mins of individual stories all connected through one and told through the lens of an aspiring, yet deranged movie writer (Quaid), I had had enough. I’m sorry that this isn’t a full review for you and for sake of spoilers I will not go into detail with what the movie contains. You can settle your own curiousity by seeking out info such as the redband trailers on YouTube. But the taglines are true. There is something for everyone in this movie: something for everyone to be offended by. Sure, I laughed a couple times, and I can handle lots of things in movies, but the raunchiness in this film made me get up and leave.Movie 43

It’s no wonder that so many of the stars in this film avoided giving interviews and praised the actors that were able to avoid being in the film. Don’t believe me? Read this article entitled “Why Guilt-Tripped Stars Won’t Promote Movie 43.” HERE. (I will say that it is admirable[?] though that someone in Hollywood would dare to make such a testy non-p/c movie in this day of censors, political correctness (p/c) . Perhaps admirable isn’t the choice word, but you know what I mean.) This film is nothing but filth, coated with a tad bit of comedy, and covered in more raunchy filth. Avoid it.

Well, there you have it folks. The first movie I EVER walked out on. Perhaps that means Movie 43 is right up your alley…and that’s okay if it is. but for me…I stayed much longer than I should have.

josh-duhamel-movie-43-thumb

Movie 43 (Score: 0.5/5) Yes, I still scored this film, even though I didn’t finish it. (the .5 is a pity score for its daring boldness)

***And I’m not alone in my thoughts. Read this article from The Huffington Post for more.

(Consider this your 2nd PSA of the day!) 😀

Thanks for reading! Happy Watching!

T, The Focused Filmographer

up next: Review for The Impossible

Advertisements

36 comments

  1. I’m excited to hear “Hansel & Gretel” is fun! I love fairy tales and I usually watch any version that comes along (and read any version that comes along, lol) but people have been dumping all over that movie so I was a bit worried. Not expecting Oscar worthiness, just wanting a good time and it sounds like it delivers!

    Movie 43 sounds atrocious. I have no clue what it’s about from the trailers I’ve seen but yeah…I mean, I make a habit of watching the worst of the worst when it comes to films but…yeah…I think I’ll skip this one.

    Great reviews!

    Like

  2. Hansel and Gretal seems like one of those “turn off your brain” type films. And i still feel Red Riding was wasted potential

    As for Movie 43…my sense of huour can be very,very low brow…so i will probably end up renting it

    Like

  3. Great reviews, I’m glad you at least enjoyed HGWH as dumb fun (I Liked it as well but about 90% of critics on rotten tomatoes seem to disagree) but I don’t think anybody’s going to fauly you on walking out of Movie 43. Without a doubt the worst movie I’ve seen since last year’s LOL. It was fun to see you tear into it though 🙂

    Like

  4. The fact that Anna Faris is in Movie 43 and that bad trailer already warned me, but thanks for doing it in your review too – I definitely won’t ever watch that movie.
    As for Hansel and Gretel, that one sounds fun.

    Like

    • So nice to have you pop by and read these reviews.

      Yep, my review summed up my thoughts on Movie 43 haha. Hansel & Gretel delivered what I had hoped for and didn’t take itself ultra-seriously which made it fun!

      Thanks for stopping in and reading/commenting!

      Like

    • haha. Fogs’ I was wondering what you would think of both these movies and my reviews!

      I saw that you posted your review for Movie 43. I’ll be by soon to check it out (Been ultra-busy this weekend).

      thanks for chiming in my friend. (also saw you watched Parker…I’m very curious to read your thoughts there too. haha)

      Like

  5. Movie 43 just looked awful… about the only reason I would want to see it is to figure out how it got all those people in the first place. The taglines turned me away immediately… “once you see it, you can’t unsee it”? That’s not an endorsement, folks.

    I’ve complained before about “comedy writers” who think vulgarity is a shortcut to humor; the marketing campaign here seems to revel in it, so it just looked like a bomb waiting to happen. Surprised you gave it even a half-star since you walked out… in my mind, there’s nothing bold about trying to be offensive.

    Like

    • I don’t know why so many comedy writers continue to insist that vulgarity=humor. SMH.

      I’m not saying that Jerry Lewis, Bob Hope, Danny Kaye and Bill Cosby are everyone’s cup of tea, but I can enjoy a movie from them and laugh way more than a lot of the comedies that come out nowadays.

      Movie 43 is just awful.

      Thanks for the comment my friend.

      Like

  6. I actually liked Red Riding Hood, it’s from the director of Twilight!

    I didn’t realise Hansel and Gretal was R Rated, up till this point I thought it was a movie for kids O.O

    Like

  7. Looking forward to finally catching Hansel and Gretel when it shows itself over here. Looks like my kind of silly fun. There’s something about fairytale stories that I love. If done well. So far, this one looks like it’s matching my expectations. If I’m to believe you and Fogs! 😀

    Like

  8. Damn it! I did choose the wrong movie to see. I’m so pissed Hansel & Gretel was worth seeing, and I chose to see Movie 43. And that link u posted about the actors was refreshing because I was disappointed in everyone who was cast to do this film…awful!

    Like

  9. I am actually interested in H&G–it does look like cheesy fun! (Underworld, shout out!) 😀

    Movie 43 looks atrocious! Yuck. Glad you confirmed it.

    I am back–been out of pocket for a bit–finally finished top of 2012–geez! 🙂

    Talk to you later!

    Like

Psst!! Join in! Leave a Comment!

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s